The Difference between Japanese and American Weddings

1.      Introduction　

   I work part time in the wedding industry, so my favorite topic was American Wedding Customs. For example, American often give each other rings, they usually receive gifts rather than money and they have a different type of wedding ceremony. I think the difference between American and Japanese weddings is huge. However, that is because they are different countries.

   American and Japanese people have a different culture and different habits, therefore they think differently.

 

2.      Japanese　

A Japanese wedding begins with a proposal, generally from the man. Research from a Japanese wedding magazine shows that the percentage of men who propose is 83.5%, women who propose is 2 %, and no proposal at all is 14%. From this, you can see that men propose the majority of the time. These proposals happen anywhere from inside the home, at a restaurant, or near the sea.

When proposing, the man offers an engagement ring to the girl. Japanese engagement rings are simple in design, but recently couples have chosen not to offer them. This is because sometimes they will already have an anniversary ring, or they simply do not buy one. About 70% people offer a ring, and 30% do not. Some people offer some other type of gift. For example, they buy pair watches or pair necklaces.

Japanese people term the phrase “June Bride”, but it’s misleading. The Ministry of Health announced that the most popular wedding months in Japan are March and November, coinciding with the spring and autumn seasons.

In Japan, the average wedding cost is \3885000. The average for a brides dress is \430000, engagement and wedding rings cost \578000, flowers costs are \220000 and food costs are \1190000.

In a traditional Japanese wedding there is a ceremony and a reception. There are five types of wedding ceremony. First, a wedding ceremony held at a Shinto shrine. This is the most traditional style in Japan.

First comes, “Sanshin”, when the bride and groom walk into the shrine to Japanese ancient court music. Second, “Shubatsu-Purification Rite” This begins the ceremony, and is done to purify the mind and body. Third, “Kensen Rite of presentation of food to god” this is a rite in which god is offered rice, rice wine and other foods. Fourth, “Norito-soujyou reading of sacred words” the bride and groom from this point on become a married couple, they appeal to the god, give thanks to the god and pray for a long, happy life together. Fifth, “Sankon-no-gi-Exchanging of nuptial cups” together, the couple each take turns to drink various sized cups of rice wine, whilst promising to love eachother. The groom drinks the small cup and then the bride drinks the small cup. The bride drinks the middle cup then the groom drinks the middle cup. The groom drinks the largest cup then the bride drinks the largest cup. Sixth, “Mikushi-azuke-no-gi-Entrusting of the comb” the bride entrusts a comb, a symbol of a woman in ancient ages to the groom. With this, they are united as one and promise to trust and help each other in their new life Seventh, “Seishi-houdoku reading of the vows” the rite where the couple face the god and personally state their vows. With the groom using his right hand and the bride using her left, they hold the vows together. Eighth, “Tamagushi-houten tamagushi rite” the bride and groom pray from the heart and place their feelings into the Tamagushi, then offer it before the god in a method of worship. Ninth, “exchange of wedding rings” the bride and groom consecrate their vows. Tenth, “Tamagushi-houten tamagushi rite” the match maker or family representative prays for a long, happy life for the couple and offersthe Tamagushi, worship before the god. Finally, “Shinzoku-Ieppai” bond tying rite. The relatives of the couple pour and exchange cups of rice wine before the god tying the bonds of the relationships of friends and family. This rite started in the year 1900. It is a traditional Japanese style.

Other kinds of weddings include church wedding, recently, many Japanese people prefer to get married in a church. Recently, some people like valuable weddings. It mean cheaper wedding. For example, 1.5 wedding party, limited midsummer, the deep of winter, a weekday, produce by student planner, their old school wedding and so on. Why would they be popular? It is because young couple doesn’t have a lot of money, but they want to good wedding ceremony, so they choice low cost plan. They can choice good dishes by low cost.

 

3.      American

        The man chooses a special date for when he is going to propose. For example, they will go to an expensive restaurant. Generally, the man says “Will you marry me?”. This is the same in Japan. If the answer is yes, the man gives his new fiancé an engagement ring. They usually contain some sort of gem. During the wedding ceremony, both the man and woman exchange wedding rings. After the wedding, the woman might get both rings turned into one.

    In America, the average wedding cost is $25,449.00(\2086,818). The average wedding dress cost is $1,025.00(\84050). Engagement and wedding rings costs are $6066.00(\497,412). Flower costs are $1,103.00(\90,446). Cake cost is $525.00(\43050). These extravagant cakes are all real. Reception costs are $9286.00(\761,452). American weddings are cheaper than Japanese, because Japanese weddings come with a lot of minor costs.

   Americans also say “June bride” because it is the summer season. This tradition came from Europe, where “June Bride” has another meaning. June is the month of marriage according to Juno, a god worshipped by women. It is said that if a woman is married during June then her life will be happier. This is easy to understand, since the United States was originally populated by immigrants from many lands, primarily Europe.  These immigrants brought their own wedding traditions with them, and these traditions, stirred in the melting pot of the United States, have slowly evolved into the traditional American wedding ceremony. There are a few things that all U.S. weddings have in common.  To begin with, U.S. wedding ceremonies may be either religious or civil.  Most brides prefer a large and rather elaborate ceremony if it is their first wedding. Marriages are not arranged. A typical U.S. wedding takes place between two people who have sought out a partner and have found someone whom they believe they can share their life with.  In other words, in the United States marriages are based on love. They are not arranged to strengthen family business or influence.

   There are Bridesmaids, Groomsmen, Flower girls and a Ring bearer in the ceremony. Bridesmaids can be the bride’s sisters or other relatives, or very close friends. They help the bride in any way possible. Groomsmen are also usually relatives or close friends. They attend to the grooms needs. A Flower girl is usually a young relative. She walks in front of the bride, holding the bouquet and tossing flower petals. The Ring bearer is a young male relative who carried the wedding rings.

   There is a tradition in which the bride wears “something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue.” It is called “Something Four.” If a bride wears them, her married life will be happier. “Something Old” expresses the family prosperity, for example, family connection, an ancestor and tradition. We succeed to ancestral thing and we hope our family’s prosperity. Generally we wear our grandmother and mother used wedding dress, ring, an earring, a brooch, a necklace or a handkerchief. “Something New” is a symbol of the couples new life together. A bride gets a new thing to bless a bride’s new life and happy future. Generally, they made to order wedding dress, wedding shoes, wedding undergarment, a pair of gloves, shoes or underwear. Generally, it is white things. “Something Borrowed” shows the relationship between friends and the neighbors.  It is a new couple gets happy by someone’s happy life. Generally, a bride borrow a handkerchief or an accessory from got married before. A bride borrow friends veil the mainstream of American. And “Something Blue” expresses the blue which is the symbol color of the Virgin Mary meaning purity. Blue is symbol of sincerity, confidence, virginity and purely.  A bride wear it inconspicuous point. Generally, a blue color flower in a bouquet, blue garter belt, tie a blue ribbon to garter belt, blue underwear or blue jewel ring.

   After the wedding, there is a bouquet and garter toss. The groom removes the bride’s garters, which are worn on the leg, and throws it into a crowd of un-married men. Whoever catches the garters is said to be next to marry. American wedding gifts don’t include money and instead are items which will help the married couple start their new life together. A party ensues for a long time after the wedding. Sometimes Japanese people use “Something Four”, but not popular.

   Recently, there has been interest in a different wedding-style. It is a drive-through wedding. It sounds very surprising. It is simply a signature and a kiss then. The newlyweds drive away in no time.

Conclusion　

   I think Japanese wedding ceremonies are very solemn Japanese people don’t dance or organize huge parties. However, Japanese weddings are based on the American models. For example, they give each other engagement rings, they say “June Bride”, a lot of brides do “something four”, and they get married in churches. An overall impression, American wedding is cheaper and more like a party. Japanese wedding is a strict and serious ritual.

Wedding ceremony style is changing simple one, I think. It has a lot of reason. My parent generation got married by design, but my generation isn’t same. Recently, a lot of couple gets married by accident. For example, women become pregnant, so they don’t have save money enough. They have to choice low cost wedding. And young people like small wedding. They think want to cut extra things. Above I think Japanese and American have own wedding culture, but it is changing simple one.

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